Getting the right man for you

Photo: Kamdora

Sure, we all go through dry spells when dating but that should not be a reason to settle for someone who really doesn’t meet your requirements just from fear of sitting home alone another weekend.

Learning to stand up for yourself and what you believe in and the ability to convey your deepest desires of what you are looking for in a mate will keep you on track to finding that special someone who not only complements you but brings out the best in you.

You deserve to be with the person who makes you feel your best, is supportive of your aspirations and accepts you for your wonderful and unique self just as you are. And never settle for anything less than that because to do so is a bigger compromise of yourself and that is wholly unacceptable. Be brave and strong enough to hold out for what you really deserve, someone who is truly worthy of your love, time, and energy.
Here are some tips on staying track and “Never Settling”:

*Have A Clear Idea Of Your Desired Attributes You Want In Your Mate
This is crucial. You cannot find Mr. Right if you do not know what it is you are looking for. This may be something like, he appreciates you for you and tells you so, or he is kind to everyone, etc. Like you wouldn’t set out driving without knowing where you are going and how you are going to get there, you wouldn’t want to start dating men without knowing specifically what it is you are looking for in a mate.

*Have A Clear Idea Of What Your Values Are And What Your Desired Family Plan Is
Knowing this beforehand will save you precious time and energy by allowing you to pass on guys who don’t share your vision and plan. Why buy an orange when you really want an apple? Knowing early on if the guys you are dating shares your vision will not only steer you clear of those who don’t, it will also make the truly eligible ones stand out from the crowd and will give you the desire to further explore them for compatibility and chemistry.

*Don’t Compromise On The Really Important Things You Want For Yourself
Relationships are a two way street and you must stand firm on the things you value and not cave because the other person isn’t keen on it. For example, if it’s really important for you that you do your masters, make sure that your mate understands that you are going to see it through with or without him. Standing up for what you believe in and value will bolster your mates respect for you and most importantly the respect you have for yourself.

*Don’t Get Caught Up In People Pleasing
Which means, don’t go along with something just to be amiable if you really do not want to. For example, don’t say you like football just to spend time with your man, if you really hate it. It is perfectly fine to have your own interests and also allow your man to have his. This will allow personal growth and also to not lose yourself in the relationship. It is very important to any healthy relationship to have other external relationships and interests.

*Speak Up
Feel free and confident to voice your true feelings, especially early on in the relationship. This will create the dynamic and space so that you can express your inner most feelings without having to explain yourself. But, be prepared and willing to walk away if you are not being heard or your feelings are not validated and valued.

Ultimately, this pact you make with and to yourself of “never settling” will create the energy of self-confidence and self-worthiness to attract that special guy truly worthy of you!

To our happiness. Cheers.



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