Issues  

Surprise! surprise!!


Against my better judgment, I decided to pay Tunji a surprise visit. I had confirmed he was in town from my father who mentioned he was going to play golf with him that morning.

I still had a key to his house and he had never bothered to ask for it back. It occurred to me that he might have changed the locks but it was worth a shot. If I wanted him back, I had to make it known through a grand gesture and not some random phone call or pathetic text message begging to talk to him.
Surprisingly, I got into his estate without any obstruction, I smiled as it was clear that he had not left instructions concerning my access at the gate. I had intentionally not driven myself there because I wanted him to be thoroughly surprised when he got in. I walked up to his front door with my heart in my mouth. I knew it would hurt badly if he had actually changed the locks. I tried my key and viola! It worked! I did a little victory dance as I stepped into the familiar house.

Everything was as I remembered, nothing had changed.
I had a plan and the plan was in a basket. I had made one of his favourite meals…pounded yam and egusi from the scratch and I could not wait to see the look on his face when he discovered my newly acquired culinary skills. I knew his schedule wouldn’t have changed much in the few months we had been apart and since there was a Manchester United game that evening, I knew he was definitely coming home to watch the game on his big screen.

The game was to start in thirty minutes and so I set the table and went to the bedroom to freshen up, and that was when the little bubble I had been in… bust. There were several pairs of female shoes arranged in front of his walk in closet. His dressing table had a make-up bag, that had obviously recently been used. I ran into the bathroom, and it was confirmed… there was definitely a woman spending a lot of time there! His bathroom shelf was now filled with all sorts of feminine products that were not mine.

I ran back into the room and pulled open the section of his closet that he had cleared out for my things…they had been replaced by clothes that were a size too small for me…obviously because they weren’t mine! I had never gotten around to coming for my things so where had he put them? I looked at my watch, the game was now to start in twenty minutes and obviously he was about ten minutes away. I had to make a decision and quick too!

I ran back to the living room, grabbed my phone and called my friend Onyeka. After filling her in she was in utter dismay
“Why in the world would you go to his house unannounced? What if he comes home with his girlfriend and walks you out? What would you do then”? She asked.
Onyeka had a point, I had been so fixated on him coming home, I had completely neglected the fact that he could very well come home with company. Onyeka and I quickly concluded that I should leave. As I hurriedly packed up my things, my phone rang…it was Tosin.
“Onyeka called me and I gave me the gist and I think you should stay put”. She said.
“Tosin are you nuts? What if he comes home with her and tells me to leave”? I asked.
“Then make it seem like you came to get your things and walk out”. She replied.

“I came to pack my things with a bowl of pounded yam and soup? And have I told you that the dress I am wearing screams… I want you back”? I said in a state of complete confusion.

“That pounded yam wahala was just a lousy idea but it is too late. Just stay put jor. I bet he would never ask you to leave”. Tosin argued.
“Ok what if he doesn’t ask me to leave and she also doesn’t leave, what happens then”? I asked her.

“One person would have to leave just make sure it’s not you. Got to go, keep me posted” With that she hung up.

I was running out of time and now more confused than ever. I dialed her number a couple of times but she didn’t pick up. I checked the time, I now had five minutes to get out. As I tried to quickly pack up, I heard a car pull up in the driveway. Busted!

I was stuck with no way out. I was now standing in the middle of the living room with the basket of food in my hand. I realized how foolish I would look if he walked in on me like that.

So I quickly set the food back on the table, turned on the television and sat on the couch like I was waiting for the game to begin. I heard the sound of his laughter as he fumbled with the door, he obviously wasn’t alone.
Gosh! I had left my key in the keyhole.

I heard him scream out his cook’s name, obviously assuming he was inside the house.
I had no choice I had to open the door for him.

Ï took a deep breath and opened the door. I was right he had female company.
He was in shock and so was the lady standing beside him.

All three of us stood staring at each other, someone had to say something and because I was the element of surprise in the mix, I decided to bell the cat.
“Welcome home baby”. I said with a wide smile.
To be continued…..
@bourdillonnights

In this article:
Layemi Olusoga


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