When He Can’t Stop Talking

“I WAS in a gathering recently,” complains one woman. “I felt so irritated by this man who talked non-stop. For the one hour or so that I sat close to him, he spoke and meaningless jabbering they were, I saw, because I could not understand a single thing he said.”    

 “Occasionally, I turned to look hard at him so he knows how annoying his behaviour was, but it appeared to encourage him to even talk more. At a time, he rattled off a rap tune he claimed to have composed. The funny thing was that he had this pretty girl who was mesmerized by him; she looked at him with shiny eyes and asked him questions.” 

 Now my question is: What does a woman get from a relationship with a man who cannot stop talking? I wonder.

  Our opinion, too, is that you are right to question; even a woman who has no control of her mouth is seen as unreliable. A man who is seen to talk too much is certainly unusual as men are seen to be silently working through their lives with deep inwards thought, not sharing or speaking loudly of even their worries. 

  His behavior may not be from nature but the responsibility that is expected of him- head of the family. That is the type of man we see as the husband type-he never makes his feelings known until he thinks through issues and when he comes down with an iron fist when he has to, a whole family knows it is time to behave well. It rarely occurs to us that Honey, Daddy or whatever name we call the head of our family is violent or feels overwhelmed with the huge responsibility he carries.

  But back to the talkative man; he will make a good companion. You may just have to guard against negative behaviours like gossiping. Think about it. You know how a rumour circulates and then it is traced to one woman, nobody takes her seriously because she is a known gossip. However, when one or two unpalatable stories are traced to your own Baba Junior, you will not feel comfortable in your neighbourhood. That is because your partner, like anybody who talks a lot, may not be disciplined enough to check out a story before he spreads it.

He Will Stick By You

He may stick, but not as staying comes thick and thin and until death do you part. He sticks as chewing gum stays annoyingly to an object. He knows the act of pleasing as a story-teller and may see a relationship as another avenue to ply his trade -tell stories to woo you a far more successful person and expects to entertain you to keep him alive. He may stay around because through his constantly running stories you are not annoyed that he can’t buy you a gift, or get a decent job because he has not the muscle or the confidence to look for one.

  He may already know that marriage is a serious union between two people, but if he believes in his abilities to charm through words, he may not be ready to go deeply into issues. Instead, he may try to back out of an argument by telling you stories of how one trailer caused a heavy traffic on the Third Mainland Bridge. How does this solve the problem of children’s school fees at the particular moment?

  This makes a great tale when you are relaxed, feet put up in front of the television, not when First Term school fees are pending. So put your foot down and present him what bills need to be paid. Don’t squeeze your face in frustration and back out when there are issues to be settled. Pin him down to some responsibility in your relationship. Make demands for what he has to do for the household.

Be Prepared To Wear the Pant

A man who talks all the time may not be able to take care of the family; if you love him and want to live with him, be prepared to work harder or to be the breadwinner. You can’t eat stories.

Will He Cheat?

The possibility is high, just as it is possible for the average man to cheat. But if he is lazy as well as talkative, he will continually look out for where the grass is greener, he thinks that there is a woman out there who will accept him as he is-a man who is ready to tell stories-entertaining her from morning till evening without making any demands from him. 

  He may want to run from a relationship where she nags from morning to evening. If he won your hands as a partner with his ability to tell stories, he is convinced that he can win other women the same way, too. And whether you believe it not, this man is a ladies’ man. Women enjoy a bit of gossip now and then and if your talkative husband is a bearer of tales, especially at work, they will flock to him and even when his unfaithfulness is in his thought, he will make you feel uncomfortable with his friendships with the opposite sex.

A Harvest Of The Girl Child

Now there is no expert backing to this claim, but some people have posited that a man who talks too much is really a woman beneath. It has been said therefore that if you marry one, you should be prepared to have many female children. It is thought that the likelihood of bearing male children is small if it is at all possible. Some people say that if the family is patient, however, that the fifth or seventh attempt may bring forth the long awaited son.

How to Handle The Situation

On the whole, you will have a happy relationship because he will be fun to have around-when there is no financial issue pressing, especially. He is one that would not really mind taking instructions from you; you may discover that he blabbers because he does not really know what is expected him, so he talks to hide his confusion. Therefore, spell out what you will like him to do for you in nice tones, not in a commanding or quarrelsome stance, remember that he is still a man who can easily feel injured and think that you want to control him. Remind him when anniversaries come around; tell him that he is expected to buy gifts for everyone, including his mother. If you have an enviable relationship with him, his family especially would claim that you have put him in your pocket.

  When his chattiness irritates you as it is bound to happen once in a while, send him on an errand, you can initiate where he can go with the children; you are lucky here, children love stories and would be highly entertained by the story told by Daddy of how he went to the forest and fought battle with an elephant. He has an engagement too-that of keeping the children quiet while you have time and space to put your thoughts in order.

  However, do not forget that his chattiness may hide a negative behaviour, for instance as an abusive spouse.


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