My Assumed Midlife Crisis
It suddenly dawned on me that I would soon be hitting 40 years (don’t worry I am not that old) but truth is my biological clock is ticking and I am a creative entrepreneur which means failure to secure the future now could mean a grave disaster.
So when I couldn’t hold the fears, pressure and uncertainties anymore, I called my travel agent to book me the cheapest flight he could get, I mean I don’t mind travelling for 3 days to get to my destination, all I wanted was to run away from reality, the things I love, the things I cherish, the familiar crowd with the unending pressure. I needed to be sure I was on the right track. The first 5 days away was heavenly, no calls, no pressure, no anger, just pure laughter, then the news of the crack within a celebrity family who happen to be very close friends shattered whatever unrealistic seclusion I thought I might have created. The world gnashed at them, the media fed on them, PR companies made them case studies, everyone became a marriage analyst and expert, laughing, barking, insulting, condemning and taking sides like it was a sort of game, not seeing their true pains or the reality of what got them here.
So I sat down to evaluate. However I try not to admit it but a lot of people look up to me, some wishing to be where I am right now, to fill my shoes, to have their presumed kind of life I live, they wish for the good side they see and fail to peep through the curtains to see me fight my personal demons, my fears, my challenges, the pressures to be consistent, the need to be better, the demand to be relevant, the need to be constantly creative and dynamic, the world expecting to see your next work so they might tear you apart if it doesn’t measure up. The pressure to be a good father, a responsible husband, a great friend, a good citizen, a well-rounded mentor. The cycle of unending pressure only worsens when you are a creative with a lot of dreams.
So these points I have come up with, I will do all I can to make myself happy, for therein lies my fulfilment.
- I will do all I can to impact people around me positively.
- I will be the best at what I do.
- I will do all I can to be better than I was yesterday but not to satisfy anyone.
- I will dispel all fears and embrace the day as it comes.
- I will modify my plans as I go so as to ensure it gets me to my destinations.
- I will be myself and not create an unrealistic impression that will make people feel I’m not vulnerable.
- I will cherish all I have and be contented with wherever I am while I work to be better.
- I will be Creative.
- I will be Kola Oshalusi.